Fifty Shades

I’m pretty sure that Oregon invented the original “50 shades of gray” before it became a popular book – which I have not read. Let’s review the highlights of how you know you live in the NW.

1) Standard issue gray – if you cannot afford gray, one will be assigned to you

2) Light gray

3) Medium gray

4) Dark gray

5) Ueber gray

6) Off gray

7) I want to off myself gray

8) I can’t find my gray mittens kind of gray

9) Merlot for breakfast gray

10) This is not an all gray suit I’m wearing, it’s my cloaking device

11) I tripped over my gray pony because I didn’t see him kind of gray

12) Gray with a hint of arctic blast chill

13) Gray with a touch of “soaked to my marrow” moisture 

14) Gray with a super-powered fog horn

15) Gray with fluffy snow-like stuff which turns ordinary people into crazy ass drivers

16) ‘Who put my zebra in a blender?’ kind of gray

17) Oh goody, it’s gray again!!

18) Does this gray make me look fat?

19) Graypes of Wrath

20) Oregon – it’s a GRAYTE state